I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
