So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize