where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
