we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
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Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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