that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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