So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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