Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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