i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize