Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
i think my cat just said my name.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
