I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Come share oat with me in your robe
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
