When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
