Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Princesses don't give blow jobs
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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