I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
