i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
where does the pee come out of this thing
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
