wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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