is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
