I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
