i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize