Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
