Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
