Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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