? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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