Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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