she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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