Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
