yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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