Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
