well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
