what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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