So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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