moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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