wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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