I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
and you fell through a lawn chair
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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