We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
