You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
