update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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