how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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