I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
