Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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