She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
