I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
