so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
