so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
