Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
so let's talk penis.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
