I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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