i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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