she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
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