All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
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