two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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