found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
handjob tips. give me some.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
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