I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
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