how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i dont even know how to be here
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
